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My Career Started With A 3600 Mile Bicycle Trek

When I was 16, I took a one-way flight to Seattle and biked my way home through an adventure program for teens. I had spent much of the previous year training for the trip, raising money to pay for it, and getting my parents' permission to go. 

I bicycled for two months alongside 6 teenagers and 2 team leaders, who were both under the age of 22. We had no cell phones, no support vehicle, and no google maps. We carried all our supplies, and slept on the ground in city parks, campgrounds, and in the backyards of people we had just met. Our team leaders would outline our daily route on a map the night before, and then we would spread out as solo riders during the day - sometimes biking over 100 miles. Looking back, it was a miracle I didn't get lost because I never carried my own map and trusted that my team leaders would be waiting for me at the next turn in the road.

During that 3600 mile ride, I peddled through some of the most beautiful landscapes in America. 

I also muddled through miles of heavy wind and rain, had a gun pulled on me as I cycled past someone's yard, almost got mowed down by a logging truck, and even experienced two fugitives tripping over our tents in the middle of the night while they were fleeing from the police. 

This adventure helped me develop the discipline and stamina to do hard things, and also the confidence to do more of them.

My Career Started With A 3600 Mile Bicycle Trek

When I was 16, I took a one-way flight to Seattle and biked my way home through an adventure program for teens. I had spent much of the previous year training for the trip, raising money to pay for it, and getting permission to go. 

I bicycled for two months alongside 6 teenagers and 2 team leaders, who were both under the age of 22. We had no cell phones, no support vehicle, and no google maps. We carried all our supplies, and slept on the ground in city parks, campgrounds, and in the backyards of people we had just met. Our team leaders would outline our daily route on a map the night before, and then we would spread out as solo riders during the day - sometimes biking over 100 miles. Looking back, it was a miracle I didn't get lost because I never carried my own map and trusted that someone would be waiting for me at the next turn in the road.

During that 3600 mile ride, I peddled through some of the most beautiful landscapes in America. 

I also muddled through miles of heavy wind and rain, had a gun pulled on me as I cycled past someone's yard, almost got mowed down by a logging truck, and even experienced two fugitives tripping over our tent in the middle of the night while they were fleeing from the police. 

This adventure helped me develop the discipline and stamina to do hard things, and also the confidence to do more of them.

Little Did I Know That This Trip Was A Defense Against Feeling My Pain

One year before this bike trek, I had my first #metoo experience - which was traumatic. This bike trip served as an important emotional defense against feeling that trauma. Here are some other emotional defenses people use when they are feeling overwhelmed:

Little Did I Know That The Trip Was A Defense Against Feeling My Pain

One year before this bike trek, I had my first #metoo experience - which was traumatic. This bike trip served as an important emotional defense against feeling that trauma. Here are some other emotional defenses people use when they are feeling overwhelmed:

It Took 25 Years to Fully Unpack This Buried Trauma

Even though these defenses can help us remain stable and functional when reality is too painful to process, it's important to eventually unpack what happened so that you can integrate it and move on with your life. If you don't do this, your unprocessed emotions will grow and mutate and turn into compulsions, complexes, and unhealthy relationships.

So after 25 years of accumulating additional traumas and bouncing from one emotional defense to the next, I finally decided to face my feelings and write my way through the pain. In the process, I did a lot of healing and created a large array of emotion literacy books and videos which are now the foundation of my work.

It Took 25 Years to Fully Unpack This Buried Trauma

Even though these defenses can help us remain stable and functional when reality is too painful to process, it's important to eventually unpack what happened so that you can integrate it and move on with your life. If you don't do this, your unprocessed emotions will grow and mutate and turn into compulsions, complexes, and unhealthy relationships.

So after 25 years of accumulating additional traumas and bouncing from one emotional defense to the next, I finally decided to face my feelings and write my way through the pain. In the process, I did a lot of healing and created a large array of emotion literacy books and videos which are now the foundation of my work.

Meet My Emotion Friends

Did you know your emotions are simply signals from your nervous system? As you learn to treat these signals like little friends, you will unlock your calm and activate your strength.

Helps you be HONEST

Helps you become CURIOUS

Helps you be BRAVE

Helps you become ASSERTIVE

Helps you become RESILIENT

Helps you be KIND

GRATITUDE, ART & COMMUNITY-CARE GAVE ME STRENGTH

A Glimmer Practice is What Made ALL the Difference

As soon as I got back from my bike trip, I met Ruth Robins who taught me about glimmers. A "glimmer" is a micro-moment of nervous system regulation which reminds you that you're strong enough and brave enough to handle whatever challenge is in front of you. Glimmers won't erase your problems, but they'll give you a tiny moment of relief which can sometimes make all the difference. You will know a glimmer is here when you feel cozy and calm and you can breathe easily.

I've been collecting glimmers for over 25 years now. It's part of my wellness routine. Back in 2011, I invited other people to participate in my glimmer practice by asking the public, "What makes you grateful?". Not only did this community-care effort help me build a nonprofit called, "Look for the Good Project," but it gave me the strength to finally face my trauma.

FINDING STRENGTH

A Glimmer Practice is What Made ALL the Difference

As soon as I got back from my bike trip, I met Ruth Robins who taught me about glimmers. A "glimmer" is a micro-moment of nervous system regulation which reminds you that you're strong enough and brave enough to handle whatever challenge is in front of you. Glimmers won't erase your problems, but they'll give you a tiny moment of relief which can sometimes make all the difference. You will know a glimmer is here when you feel cozy and calm and you can breathe easily. 

I've been collecting glimmers for over 25 years now. It's part of my wellness routine. Back in 2011, I invited other people to participate in my glimmer practice by asking the public, "What makes you grateful?". Not only did this community-care effort help me build a nonprofit called, "Look for the Good Project," but it gave me the strength to finally face my trauma.

Here's a video that was created by children back in 2013, when I was just beginning my work in schools:

Community-Care With Kids

Here's a video that was created by children back in 2013, when I was just beginning my work in schools.

 

My Glimmer Practice Gently Melted Away My Defenses

Before I was ready to process all the things that had happened, I spoke about my trauma through an allegory of a whale being entangled in crab trap lines. It was based on a true story about a whale rescue which I had published in a children's book called, "Look for the Good." 

This whale story was the subject of many of my school visits, television interviews, and keynotes from 2011 - 2019. But as I gathered strength through my glimmer practice, I was able to dive beneath this version of the story to slowly sort through the many layers of deeper reality which still needed to be processed. 

In therapeutic settings, this deeper dive needs to be facilitated with care. If a person's defenses disappear too quickly, they will get overwhelmed and re-traumatized. Melting defenses slowly over time allows the person to adjust to each new layer of emotional content as it emerges, without getting overwhelmed. This gradual approach is essential for sustainable healing.

I still tell the whale story because it's a safe way to share my journey with kids without getting into the details of my trauma.

My Glimmer Practice Gently Melted Away My Defenses

Before I was ready to process all the things that had happened, I spoke about my trauma through an allegory of a whale being entangled in crab trap lines. It was based on a true story about a whale rescue which I had published in a children's book called, "Look for the Good: A Story About the Ocean, Grace and Gratitude." 

This whale story was the subject of many of my school visits, television interviews, and keynotes from 2011 - 2019. But as I gathered strength through my glimmer practice, I was able to dive beneath this version of the story to slowly sort through the many layers of deeper reality which still needed to be processed. 

In therapeutic settings, this deeper dive needs to be facilitated with care. If a person's defenses disappear too quickly, they will get re-traumatized. Melting defenses slowly over time allows the person to adjust to each new layer of emotional content as it emerges, without getting overwhelmed. This gradual approach is essential for sustainable healing.

I still tell the whale story because it's a safe way to share my journey with kids without inappropriately getting into the details of my trauma.

My Life Mission

To make mental health more fun. 

I use cartoons to simplify complex ideas in psychology and make them more accessible to the public. I believe this is an effective way to improve emotional literacy within communities and disrupt cycles of intergenerational trauma.

My Life Mission

To make mental health fun. 

I use cartoons to simplify complex ideas in psychology and make them more accessible to the public. I believe this is an effective way to improve emotional literacy within communities and disrupt cycles of intergenerational trauma.

I Do This Work in Loving Memory Of:

Ruth Robins

Debbie Goodrow

My Grandma